Man, It's Tough.

I can't imagine what it feels like to be Chad. To go through what he has to go through. To endure the trials and tribulations. It must be impossible because to be ME - the 'caregiver', it is beyond difficult.

The feeling of helplessness. The worry. The fear. The uncertainty. The inability to understand and gauge for myself. Relying entirely on someone else to describe exactly what is going on. Pardon my language - but it's fucking hard.

Chad has had pain all day and hasn't had a bowel movement since yesterday. I am so worried he is on the verge of an obstruction. It may be nothing, it may be something. I know some pain can be 'normal' but I also just wish the appointment with the GI doctor was tomorrow instead of 9 days away. The VA has been amazing for our family, I can't complain. I just hate feeling so helpless and at the mercy of them and a 3 hour drive to get help. The only way we can get actual medical attention without waiting forever and making the trek is going to the ER but in order for them to approve out of VA care, it HAS to be extreme. 

So we're left waiting. Grinning and baring it and hoping it will pass on its own. 

God please, let this pass on it's own. :(