Friday, April 17, 2015

The Hardest Thing Is Not Having A Plan

This journey has never been easy, even though we have been very blessed to have received good news along the way. Chad's recovery is still progressing and we're hopeful the doctor appointments next week will provide some answers and help us put a plan in place.

Our family and friends have been amazing in supporting us and donating money to get us through.  But money doesn't last forever and I am starting to get stressed out. I know this is mostly in my head but I am a worrier and a planner by nature and it's hard for me not to look ahead.

We are okay for now but there's a chance Chad may not get back to work until June and when I try to plan and figure out how we're going to get through, I can't lie. I get panicked. I know it's just a matter of pinching more pennies and not buying anything unless it's an absolute necessity but it is so hard to keep life 'normal' sometimes. Gas alone lately costs me up to $40 a week. I know that may not seem like much but it adds up and quickly. Chad's diet is different than it used to be so we have to buy more healthy food and man - what a difference that makes on the grocery bill.

Really, I am just venting. I know in my heart, everything will be okay. I just stress out because I don't want Chad trying to go back to work until he is physically able without hurting himself or risking further injury, you know? Paying a few bills on time, just isn't worth the risk. But we'll get through.

Just once more obstacle.

Hopefully on the eve of April 23rd, I will have good news. That they ran some scans and everything is healing okay. That Chad's pain has let up considerably, that Chad will not need chemo as the potential perks don't outweigh the risks and that Chad is feeling great and will be going back to work and getting his life back on track by suchandsuch date! That's my goal.

In the mean time, I'll continue to ask you for your prayers, love and support. That bad pain Chad had the other night has alleviated slightly. We just pray for even a slight improvement, each day.,

Much Love,

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